mardi, juillet 07, 2009

Day One

Here we go... After 5 hours by train, I am in Stuttgart, Germany, spending the night at my friends DJ Ojo and Mesii. Tomorrow morning, we will leave for Poland, heading to the legendary Slot Festival. Good night folks.

jeudi, mai 07, 2009

Jesus Freaks 3000 - rocking Bern (Switzerland)!

Yesterday evening I had the opportunity to share about my life at the monthly meeting of the Jesus Freaks 3000, in Bern, Switzerland.

Actually I had misunderstood an email I got asking me to preach and I thought I was asked to give my testimony.

But anyway, I talked a bit about the evolution of my life with God, and about what's happening in my life, with the growing wish of following Jesus whatever it may cost.

We had very deep and good talks about prophecy in general, about God talking, and we prayed with each other. The presence of God was almost touchable! I got filled with peace.

I really love this church! They went through good and bad times, everything is not always easy, but it's such a joy and inspiration to see their faithfulness, to see them building the Kingdom, growing spiritually, whatever!

This church has always been there to support me, either spiritually or materially, and I love them. I wish I had spent more time with them in the past.

Well... They're great guys! If you have the opportunity to visit them: do it!

We spent the rest of the evening drinking beer at the Reitschule, a famous alternative, very fucked-up bar near the train station. It was a very good time.

We all went to sleep kind of late, so to get up this morning was a torture!

So I'm back at work now.

Tomorrow, a few friends from Steiger Minneapolis (USA) will visit me and play in a club here with their band. I look forwards to seeing them and will surely write about the day!

See ya then!

lundi, avril 27, 2009

The first Prophecy.

As I was 18, I was still slowly discovering the realms of God's kingdom. Lots of things were new to me as I had made a decision for Jesus only one year earlier.

Curious, I went to listen to a so-called prophetic event where a so-called prophet from Germany was preaching. I was scared to death that he would tell everybody in the room about my hidden sins, but he didn't.

In fact, I was not expecting getting any word from him. I barely knew what prophecy was about. I was very sceptical as the dude was preaching.

After a while, he looked at me and told "I have something for you".

I was thinking "oh shit!"

He told me (I can remember his - almost - exact words):

"You,

you will leave everything behind. You will leave your country, your friends, your family. God will lead you to another country.

No one will support you. You will experience real loneliness. Your family, your friends, your church will declare you crazy and won't stand behind you. You will know what suffering means, but through it you will learn God's Grace and Love in the deepest way.

It will be God's way to form you for some bigger purpose.

After that, you will go to many different countries, working with people nobody would think they are Christians. You will do things nobody did before. You will do things nobody understands. You will go to places no Christians would go to.

That's God's will for you."

As a 18 year old teenager, I had just started my graphic design studies, I had a sweet girlfriend and wanted nothing else than staying in Switzerland and live a happy life with her. Some voice in me was telling me "what the guy said is the truth. And it will be without her (my girl)".

I got really panicked. My representation of God was sooo bad that I had the feeling that, if any of this was true, I would be nothing but a tool in his hands.

So I decided to try to live with an intellectual faith and not care about the spiritual stuff anymore. But two years later, I had a time where I was feeling God was calling me, and I told him that if this prophecy was true, then I would agree to do it. (I had ended my relationship inbetween).

Two weeks later I went to Germany to a concert and spent the whole night talking with a guy I met about the Jesus Freaks. It really spinned around in my head... A few other, personal things happened and 9 months later (time for a pregnancy, haha!) I was moving to Nuremberg, Germany. There I could grow, started serving, doing little things in my church, then helping out with the Freakstock festival, leading a home group, then doing more and more for the Jesus Freaks movement.

But the dude had been right. At the beginning, nobody supported me and people called me crazy. Everything went fine (except for the money) 3 years long and then I went through the toughest times in my life. I was suffering, confused, was feeling so lonely (I could cry ;-) ). After a while I realized that I had needed the whole process to finally discover God's Grace and Love and being set free from my tries to deserve God's love. I went deep into that dimension and I believe it is something I have to share with the people around me: Grace! The amazing miracle that took place at the Cross. The reconciliation between the human and the divine.

A few years later, I'm still going deeper into this stuff, learning through good and also tough times, but I think the first prophecy I ever got is getting fulfilled. Now.

I don't know how. God knows.

Well, that's all folks!

Subway to Heaven

Dear friends,

This blog has been existing for a long time now. I've posted stuff now and then, but everything in German.

As I have pals and friends all over the world and some of them seemed quite interested in what I experience in life and with God, I decided to let this blog go English!

There are a lot of things going on in my life right now, and I'll let you know the first part...

Actually, everything started years ago. I was working full-time for an amazing festival in Germany called Freakstock and was working for Jesus Freaks International.

I had a small amount of money for a living, not because the Jesus Freaks are greedy, but because we had not a lot of money. Suddenly I had got fed up with this lifestyle and decided to leave Germany to go back to Switzerland. I told God I wanted a normal job, with good money and a better life-standing.

So I got it. A big American company hired me as a customer representative in three languages (French, German, English), I made good money, could buy stuff I never owned in my whole life (for the first time my own computer! Woohoo! I LOOOVE my Mac Book Pro) but the job was crazy, the company was crazy (capitalism über alles!) and after two years I landed in a big burnout. I was on sick leave and then decided to resign from my position. I was feeling good at home and didn't know what the future would be about.

My relationship with God had lost a lot of intensivity, I understood that I was missing visiting and supporting churches. But I didn't want to give up whatever I had afforded in two years (fuck consumerism!). Well.

Then, through strange circumstances, I met a friend of mine who's a missionary in Mozambic. I've known her for a long time, she had been my leader as I was living in Nuremberg, Germany.
She asked me how I was doing and I told her that I finally felt at home in my city (Neuchâtel, Switzerland) and that I wanted to stay there and not go away anymore.

She started laughing and said: "Haha, forget it! Your apostolic heart will soon wake up and you will go away. Soon!"

Somehow I was thinking "F**k, she may be right! I don't want that". I was feeling inside of me that God was talking. But I'm shy and easily scared, so I landed into panic.

A few days afterwards I went to Wroclaw, Poland, to the probably best festival in the world, called Slot Festival (www.slot.art.pl). There, we had daily meetings with leaders of underground projects and churches from all over Europe and I felt at home. The dreams I had buried deep in my heart were coming back to life.

I also met a girl there from the Subchurch (Oslo, Norway) who then became my girlfriend. In the summer and then in the fall, I went to Oslo and spent great times there. I had lots of things going on and inner fights with myself and God's calling. I was considering moving to Oslo (greatest city in the world ;-) with one of the greatest churches in the world ) but wasn't really sure. Unfortunately, the relationship didn't work out so we decided to be just friends. But I still wanted to move away from Switzerland. Something strong was moving inside of me and I couldn't stop it. I was needing a church, a strong church where I could just be myself and get support for whatever I would do.

Months went by and it was a pretty tough time for me. I was depressed, unemployed, was feeling very lonely and was praying about the future. I had dreams, but they couldn't get true (so did I think).

An older, wiser friend of mine wrote me a short message to tell me one sentence he got from God for me: "Flee, my beloved". I knew God was speaking. I didn't know what to do and was scared to death.

A few months ago, I went to eat with one of my closest friends and he told me that he had thought a lot about me and my life. He asked me how long I would need to finally accept that I would never get happy with a 9 to 5 job in whatever company, but that I should follow God's calling on my life. He told me that God told him to give me the tenth of his salary for three months in case I would decide to leave everything behind and go away to build the Kingdom.

It made me feel uncomfortable and I had to think about it. At home, I made a calculation of how much money I would need per month in order to pay my mandatory health-insurance, my taxes, a place to rent to put my stuff in, money for train tickets (I don't have a driving license) and food.
I told God that I refused to go away and live "by faith", without any money. Because I had already tried it out and I almost ended in jail because of unpaid bills. I told Him that if people would give me the amount of money I calculated I would need to survive, I would do it and try it out for three months and then see what would happen.

As I was thinking about it and was feeling panicked, I got a phone call from a girl from Germany I had heard nothing from the last two years. She told me that she didn't know what was happening in my life, but God had given her something to tell me: "Mik, the time of building tents to survive (Paul's occupation) is over for you. God calls you as an apostle, in full-time ministry. And the time has come for you to start. Go away and start. Find an Antioch where you can have a base and be the apostle I anointed you to be". It made me very confused.

I asked God for confirmation.

Two weeks later, a German woman I had heard nothing of in three years called. She said that she had been praying for me and that God had spoken to her, telling her that I'm an apostle, and that the Lord calls me to serve him full-time, and that He would give me a base to start traveling, a base where people would support me and set me free for my service. She told other things that answered a lot of questions, without me asking any questions. I was amazed because the Holy Spirit's presence was so intense as she was speaking... I almost started crying.

I was choked and still told God that I was missing 300€ (500$) a month to start my "ministry".

Then I got an email from a woman I don't know that well, and she told me the same... That God had showed her that times of frustration were over because He sends me now in an apostolic ministry and she told me that God had told her to give me a part of her "God's money" if I decided to obey and go away.

I couldn't believe what I was reading. I had asked nobody for money...

So I calculated that 1000€ (1500$) were missing for my three-months budget. I told God that, as a sign, if He would give me the money, I would sign off my appartment and leave this summer.

A few days after this prayer, I met a friend of mine and she gave me an envelope with 1000€ inside, telling me that God had told her to give me this amount of money. Crazy, crazy...

So on the next day I signed off my appartment for the end of June.

I'm scared to death but I think God has spoken... So many coincidences are just impossible.

Crazy story, isn't it?

I will be homeless again soon, with a backpack and a laptop. Too bad I don't have a car, but God will provide, I'm sure.

I have enough money to survive three months long... What comes afterwards is a mystery...

But I would definitely love to visit your groups. I don't have much to give, but I would love to hear your stories, pray with you, share what God put on my heart and support you however I can. It's really what my heart is burning for.

If you want me to visit you, please write me an email: 731k3z3[at]gmail.com or let me a comment here with a way to get in touch with you...

God bless!

Mik

jeudi, avril 16, 2009

youmikmesick goes english?

Hey Folks,

Vielen Dank für alle eure Ermutigungen, es tat sehr, sehr gut.

Nun ist es so weit: ich weiss warum es mir so schlecht ging. Jetzt geht's mir ziemlich gut.

Ich habe einen Job bis Ende Juni, der ziemlich cool ist.

Seit einem Jahr sagen mir regelmässig Leute, die mich gut oder kaum kennen, immer das Gleiche: dass sie in mir eine apostolische Berufung (was auch immer es heissen soll) sehen. Ich hab oft dafür gebetet, dass Gott mir zeigt, wie ich es ausleben könnte. Ich sagte ihm, ich würde nichts tun, solange ER mich nicht sendet.

Um es kurz zu machen kamen die letzten Monate mehreren Eindrücke von Leuten, die das Gefühl hatten, Gott sage mir "Es ist an der Zeit". Ich weiss nocht nicht ob ich Details hier dazu geben will, das erzähle ich euch aber sehr gerne "live".

Ich sagte Gott dass, damit ich eventuell meinen Rucksack, Bibel und Laptop einpacke, Er sich um meine Finanzen kümmern soll. Ich wollte nicht einfach so aus dem Glauben leben, ich hab's ne kurze Zeit gemacht, es ist mir zu stressig, echt.

Ohne dass ich jeh um Geld bat kamen zwei Leute auf mich zu, die mir sagten, Gott hätte ihnen gesagt, sie sollen mich für 3 Monate finanziell unterstützen. Was nicht ganz meine Lebenskosten (Krankenversicherung, Steuern, Gebühren, Möbellager, Zugkosten, Essen) decken würde.

Ich rechnete alles durch und stellte fest, es fehlten mir 1000 Euro um meine Kosten für 3 Monate zu decken. Ich sagte Gott dass wenn ich diese Summe geschenkt kriegen würde, dann würde ich meine Wohnung kündigen und mich "probeweise" auf dem Weg durch Europa für 3 Monate machen.

3 Tage später kam eine Freundin auf mich zu, die nichts davon wusste, und gab mir einen Umschlag mit folgendem Kommentar: "Gott hat mich darum gebeten, dir diesen Betrag zu geben, ich weiss aber nicht warum." Im Umschlag waren zwei 500€ Scheine.

Plötzlich fühlte ich mich total verunsichert, aber irgendwie dachte ich dass es jetzt ziemlich deutlich war. Ich kündigte also meine Wohnung und mein ganzes Leben in der Schweiz zum ersten Juli.

Was danach kommt weiss ich noch nicht. Ich will Gruppen, Gemeinden, Projekte unterstützen wie ich es kann, Leute einfach nur besuchen und schauen was der Herr macht, und wenn die Möglichkeit sich ergibt, gerne predigen, prophetisch dienen, meine Gaben zur Verfügung stellen und auch konkret mit meinen Händen helfen, wenn Hilfe benötigt wird.

Mein Herz brennt fürs Internationale, für die Underground Jesus Sachen in Europa. (Deshalb überlege ich mir, auf diesem Blog weiterhin auf English zu schreiben)

Tja, kurz erzählt ist es meine Geschichte und der momentane Stand der Sache.

Ihr könnt gerne dafür beten, dass Gott mir Türe aufmacht.

Ich hab echt ein Problem mit Minderwertigkeit, ich hab immer das Gefühl, nichts zu geben zu haben, aber immerhin merke ich dass Gott oft Sachen durch mich macht, die mir nicht mal bewusst sind.

Ich würde euch also sehr gerne besuchen, ich kann gerne preachen, beten, renovieren, Penner füttern oder was auch immer eure Gemeinde brauchen kann.

Am Besten bin ich auf Facebook (Mik Clottu) zu kontaktieren, oder per Email an 731K3Z3[at]gmail.com

PS: Es gibt eine Sache, wofür ich täglich seit mehreren Jahren bete: mehr Liebe, mehr Freude, mehr Weisheit, mehr Demut. Das will ich unbedingt haben, ihr könnt gerne dafür beten.

Ich hoffe wirklich, dass Gott mich benützen wird, aber irgendwie waren so viele Zeichen und Eindrücke da... Hoffentlich sendet Er mich wirklich. Ich hab den Schritt gemacht, alles zu kündigen, und wir werden sehen, wie lange es hält. Erstmal 3 Monate, und dann weiterschauen.

Ich hab Angst aber freue mich gleichzeitig, und im Innersten habe ich Frieden. Gott muss jetzt nur an meinen Minderwertigkeitskomplex arbeiten, dann wird alles super. :-)

Segen euch!

Euer Mik

lundi, janvier 05, 2009

Die Wichtigkeit der Gemeinschaft?

Hey Folks,

Ich weiss, meine letzten Einträge waren ziemlich depressiv, ich kann aber nichts dafür. ;-)

Ich merke z.Z., dass Gemeinschaft mir so sehr fehlt, dass ich am überlegen bin, aus der Schweiz weg zu ziehen und mir einen Ort aus zu suchen, wo ich eine Gemeinde finden kann, die mir erlaubt, geistliche Gemeinschaft mit Freunden zu erleben.

So sehr ist mir Gemeinschaft wichtig.

Es kämen ein paar Orte in Frage, ich muss es mir aber gut überlegen, denn ich nicht weiss, ob es die Antwort auf meine Fragen, die Lösung für meine Probleme wäre. Das weiss ich nicht.

Aber es fehlt mir einfach so sehr. Mein geistliches Leben ist schwach und wakelig, und ich sehne mich nach einer Möglichkeit, ein geistliches Miteinander zu erleben.

Ich weiss aber nicht, ob es nur eine Flucht wäre, die nichts wirklich verändern würde.

Keine Ahnung... So viele Fragen im Kopf... Mal gucken.